Lying children may seem like a simple, natural act of deflecting blame. However, a successful lie requires a great deal of cognitive skills. Many parents may feel anxious when they notice that their child is telling lies.
However, lying can help us understand the social and cognitive development of children.
_ The ability to lie develops.
Children often lie without a doubt. When they deny that they have done something badly, make sure that they did it, they often lie to get something they want, or avoid something they do not want to do, and also lie to make themselves more impressive and to inflate their self-esteem, you may find an occasional lie about duties Household, or break a vase and charge the cat in the house or its younger sibling.
Developmental psychologists have been studying the ability to lie for decades, and they discovered that it manifests itself at the age of two years.
However, starting at around age 4, when most children begin to lie to hide a crime, this high rate of lying persists throughout childhood. But the lies don’t stop there.
_ Reasons for lying in children.
The parenting style is reflected in all aspects of the child’s life, and experts say that lying disorder in children is not inherited or innate in the child, but rather is a result of what he saw of the behavior, whether it was at home, school or any surrounding environment, but the role of parents remains the main influence On this behavior.
Here is a list of the most prominent causes of lying in children:
_ Fear of punishment.
This type of lying is called preventive or defensive lying, and the child does it in fear of the parents ’strictness and severe punishment if he commits a wrong act, and the child may lie in order to preserve for himself a privilege, because if he says truthfulness, this privilege will be lost.
_ An imitation of the parents and surrounding people.
The child imitates the parents or the people around him in many behaviors, including lying, and this may negatively affect the child even if the parents do so in the child’s interest.
Exaggerated strict control by parents creates a feeling of stubbornness, defiance and deliberate mistakes in the child, and it is possible for him to lie in order to escape from some of the tasks that his parents impose on him.
_ Get attention.
A child may lie to seek affection, care, and tenderness, and this occurs as a result of the parents’ failure to show their love for him.
_ Fertile imagination.
Some children have such a fertile imagination that they cannot distinguish between reality and reality. This could be caused by watching television, including movies, series, and cartoon programs. Parents should in this case develop this imagination in a beneficial way instead of the child using it wrongly, as he resorts to lying in order to create fairy tales.
_ How to treat lying in children.
Here are some steps to follow if your child gets used to his little lies:
_ Using the rewards method and giving up hitting or taunting is the best method. Hitting leads to the opposite result, so the child becomes more skilled in practicing lying, as he does not know that what he is doing is wrong.
_ Praise him if he says the truth, then this is considered more effective.
_ Dispensing with children’s stories that warn of the sinister fate of liars, such as “Pinocchio”, because they fail to dissuade the child from lying, and they can be compensated for by stories in which truth is met with approval.
_ Let your child know how frustrated you are when he does not tell you the truth, to reinforce the idea that lying can damage a person’s credibility and relationships.
_ Do not call him a liar, and try to understand the reasons why he does not tell the truth. You will not only get the truth, and you will most likely gather information that may help you to reinforce it in the future.
_ Reinforce unconditional love. The last thing children want to do is disappoint their parents, which is why you should let them know that although you may not like their behavior at times, there is nothing that will change your love for them.
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